Sour Alba » Sour Alba by Stewart Kirkpatrick – journalism, Scotland, the web, politics

How could people be so stupid?

Stewart — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 14:22:00 +0000

The BNP winning seats in the Euro elections puts the nail in the coffin of my belief in the United Kingdom. I know there are bigots aplenty in Scotland but I want no part in a country that elects fascists.

But this parody of a BNP video cheered me up greatly.

Remember, in the words of The Angelic Upstarts, “fascism doesn’t start with concentration camps, that’s where it ends”.

Chocolate teapot distances itself from Gordon Brown

Stewart — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 10:19:28 +0000

Gordon Brown’s troubled premiership last night suffered another blow with the news that a Chocolate Teapot was distancing itself from the Prime Minister “for the sake of its reputation”.

Sources close to the cacao-based container said it was “deeply concerned” about its standing within British politics if it continued to be associated with the Brown regime.

This shock defection follows a slew of similar movs by key figures, including:

One Legged Man at an Arse-kicking Competition
Inflatable Dartboard
Spare Prick at a Wedding

Friends of the PM moved to play down the split, saying: “I, uh, I mean the Primer Minister sees this as an opportunity to promote thrusting, new talent such as a Catflap in a Submarine and Fart in a Wind Tunnel.”

The row overshadowed an attempt by Mr Brown to defy his critics by organising a piss-up in a brewery – an event which featured a range of beverages supplied by the Temperance Society.

An earlier attempt to find his own arse with both hands and a map floundered due to a compass error.

Foulkes gets it soooooooooo wrong

Stewart — Tue, 12 May 2009 13:38:09 +0000

Lord Foulkes has demonstrated how out of touch politicians are with public feeling by attacking BBC journalists for criticising MPs’ expenses. Sure, there are newsreaders who get paid more than most of us think they should. But they are not clearly on the fiddle, unlike some of George’s former colleagues in the Lower House.

Gong for Middle East peace envoy

Stewart — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 18:08:22 +0000

Eeh, Tony Blair’s doing a rare job as Middle East peace envoy, isn’t he? No wonder his big pal Dubya is giving him the US’s highest civilian honour, the Order of the Useful Idiot.

Meanwhile, in the aforementioned Middle East, heads may be scratched as to what “peace” Bliar is being rewarded for. Israeli forces continue to pound Gaza, Hamas continues to fire missiles into Israel.

Do you think Dubya would be busying himself with baubles if, say, Iran was behaving in the way that Israel is?